From the outside, I probably looked like I had it all together.
I was running a business, raising my child, managing a home, juggling relationships, and showing up with a smile.
I was efficient. Capable. Independent.
I was the woman people came to for advice.
What they didn’t know is that I was also drinking every night.
Not always falling-down drunk, not waking up in alleyways — but enough to wake at 3 a.m. with anxiety, enough to feel immense guilt every morning, enough to keep making rules I couldn’t keep….tomorrow I would change….
I wasn’t out of control by society’s standards — which made it harder to admit there was a problem.
Because the truth is: high-functioning women often struggle the most with quitting drinking.
And here’s why…
💔 1. We’re rewarded for being able to “handle it all.”
Women who are seen as strong, successful, and capable are often praised for pushing through. We don’t get asked how we really are. We’re expected to manage — motherhood, money, relationships, stress — with a full face of makeup and a glass of wine in hand.
📊 A 2020 study published in JAMA Network Open found that alcohol use among women increased by 41% during the pandemic, especially among those balancing high-stress careers and caregiving.
We’re told we “deserve” a drink at the end of the day.
But what if the thing we turn to for comfort is actually the thing draining our power?
🥂 2. Wine culture is disguised as self-care.
There’s a whole culture designed to normalise (and glamorise) women drinking:
“It’s wine o’clock.”
“Mummy needs her juice.”
“Rose all day.”
We laugh at the memes. We buy the mugs. But inside, many of us feel ashamed of how often we’re drinking — and how badly we need it to just get through the day.
It’s no wonder we hesitate to quit. Quitting feels like saying goodbye to pleasure, to fitting in, to that tiny release at the end of a long day.
But here’s what I’ve learned:
Real self-care doesn’t come in a glass.
It comes from healing what the wine is masking.
🙈 3. We’re experts at hiding. Even from ourselves.
The most capable women are often the most convincing at pretending everything is fine. We perform. We perfect. We show up.
But inside? We’re falling apart.
We tell ourselves:
- “At least I’m not drinking in the morning.”
- “Everyone else drinks like this.”
- “I work hard. I deserve it.”
This denial keeps us stuck. Because we think if we’re not rock bottom, it must not be bad enough to quit.
But you don’t need to hit rock bottom.
You just need to get honest.
And that’s often the bravest, hardest step of all.
🌊 4. We feel too much — and carry it all alone.
High-functioning women are often deeply sensitive, intuitive, and emotional. We’ve just learned to hide it under competence.
Alcohol becomes a way to dim that intensity — to quiet the overwhelm, the pressure, the pain we don’t have time to process.
But over time, the thing that numbs also silences the parts of us that are wise, wild, and alive.
The truth?
We’re not too much.
We’re carrying too much — and drinking was the only coping tool we had.
🧠 5. We think willpower should be enough.
We’re used to fixing things. Solving problems. Getting it done.
So when we can’t “just stop drinking,” we feel like failures.
But alcohol dependence isn’t a character flaw — it’s a physiological, emotional, and spiritual loop that needs gentle unwinding.
📊 According to the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism, only about 10% of people who need help for alcohol use ever receive it.
Why? Because shame keeps them silent — especially high-achieving women.
Willpower isn’t the answer.
Support is.
Ready to Try 30 Days?
If you’re a high-functioning woman quietly struggling with drinking — you’re not weak.
You’re just tired of carrying it all alone.
✨ The First 30 Days is a gentle, soul-led guide to help you step away from alcohol and back into your truth.
It’s not about perfection.
It’s about beginning.
👉 Click here to get your copy
Because you deserve more than this.
You deserve your whole self back.
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